Date 7 – Ricardo

Welcome to date 7 of 26

Guy Profile

Name: Ricardo
Age: 23
Height: 5.10
Occupation: Sales Assistant
Location of date: Leicester Square, London
Date: 28/03/2012

Readers please refer to date 3 to find out how I met Ricardo.

As for those of you who have already read date 3, you may want to refer back to it to remind yourself of who Ricardo is and how our first date went.

Why a second date?

Some of you may be wondering why I went on a second date with Ricardo when the vote was for a second date with Curtis. If you are I’m glad because it shows you are paying attention to my dating life, lol. On a serious note – I decided to go on a second date with Ricardo because honestly, I felt bad, for the way I had treated him and I felt like the least I could do was to see him again.

Since date 1 I have communicated sporadically with Ricardo and right until last week I didn’t feel a way about doing so. That’s the way I have pretty much treated the other guys that I’ve been on dates with; the ones that I still keep in touch with anyway.  Whilst writing this I can’t help but hold back slightly and sigh because I feel bad thinking about my actions. Ricardo opened up to me and expressed his confusion about my actions after our date. He thought we had a good time and doesn’t understand why I wouldn’t want to keep in touch and want to get to know him some more.

I have to say readers, when he expressed those words to me, in his own words of course, I felt like I was kicked into reality and I felt the need to make up for my bad behaviour. I sent him a message a day or two later asking him if he was busy and unfortunately he was not in London. When he asked why, I told him: ‘I asked because I wanted to check if you would like to see a movie with me’. His response was one of frustration because every time he wanted to see me beforehand I was busy or too tired, according to him, and when I was prepared to see him he wasn’t in London.

Just like any guy who likes a girl, when he got back to London he got in touch and he made plans with me to go to the cinema and he agreed to see a movie that I wanted to see, that he wasn’t entirely interested in. The movie was: The Best Exotic Marigold hotel. The movie theatre by the way was full of OAP's (old age pensioners). A colleague of mine and I joked about the theatre being full of OAP’s because the film is about OAP’s but I didn’t really think that would be the case. To our surprise it was and Ricardo and I were the youngest people in there. It didn’t put me off but I thought it was funny to see so many OAP’s in the theatre, it’s not something I’m used to but non-the-less it didn’t affect my viewing of the film and I thought the film was good. The courage that the hotel owner in the film showed was very admirable and I liked the moral of the film.

Film review to the side, whilst watching the film Ricardo did the classical yawn stretch, where a guy stretches in the cinema and tries to put his arm around the girl that he is with. Unluckily for him my head did not allow the arm to go any lower and I shoved his arm off with my head. About 15 minutes later, he tried to lean in for a kiss and I quickly moved my body away and asked him: ‘what are you doing?’ He didn’t answer thankfully. At this point I felt awkward. Awkward because I know my response to him leaning in for a kiss can be embarrassing for a guy and also because I thought it might make things uncomfortable.

After the movie things were ok and it was as if the attempt for a kiss never even happened, phew.

As our date was on Wednesday we both headed towards the direction of home because it was getting late and we both had work the next day. On the way to my bus stop he mentioned that we should go to the theatre next and see Wicked or one of those very popular theatre plays. I went along with the conversation and gave him the impression that yeah we should, but I felt really bad because I could see that in his mind it’s only natural that we meet again because we are getting on well and apart from the fact that I’m not always easy to contact and the fact that I seem to always be busy or tired everything is going well and we are heading in the direction that couples go in before officially getting into a relationship.

Ricardo is a very nice guy and he has a lot going for him but I don’t have any romantic feelings towards him at all. I would love to be his friend but I don’t think he would like that. I think it’s best that I don’t see him anymore. I just need to pluck up the courage and let him know that I don’t feel the way I should feel for him and it’s not fair on him if I continue seeing him.

It is my understanding that in North America it is common practice to date different guys at the same time but in the UK that isn’t the case. Is it right to date more than one guy in search of finding the right guy , especially as I don’t get intimate with any of them? Or am I being a player and blog or no blog, is what I’m doing just completely wrong, especially as I may hurt people like Ricardo along the way?

Readers I want your opinions. I really do feel bad about potentially hurting Ricardo and I’m really evaluating whether I should continue this challenge or not.

Please be honest and let me know what you think.

Thanks for reading My dating Year – Date 7

Date 6 – Curtis

Welcome to date 6 of 26!

Guy Profile
Name: Curtis
Age: 24
Height: 6.2
Occupation: Music Producer/ Product Design Student
Location of date: London Bridge, London

How I met Curtis
The same friend that introduced me to Ricardo told me that she had another guy that I might be interested in. She described him as talkative and nerdy looking because he wears glasses. I didn’t mind because 26 dates is a lot of dates so I can’t afford to be picky.

From what I gathered from what my friend told me and Curtis himself, my friend’s ex, who is close friends with Curtis told Curtis that I like him and gave him my name to search for me on facebook. When he found me on facebook after several different attempts at spelling my name because he was given the wrong spelling, he added me and also asked my friend for my blackberry messenger (bbm) pin and he added me on bbm too.

Communication duration before talks of date
After I had confirmed his request on bbm and facebook we pinged (ping is a term used for sending messages on bbm) each other that very day and the following days. Our conversation was flowing quite well on bbm so I mentioned he should call me so that we can speak properly. After sending him the message stating that he should call me, I patiently waited by my phone for his call for about 5 minutes and then I thought: ‘oh, this boy does not have my number’. Even though we had only been communicating for 2 days on bbm, I felt very much like I knew him already and felt as though he had my number.

I sent Curtis my number and he called me pretty much right away. I told him how I assumed he already had my number and my waiting by the phone for his call. It was a nice ice breaker even though we didn’t need one because as I said it felt like we had known each other for some time.  When he called me I was about 7mins away from finishing an episode of Take Me Out online. Instead of being a nice attentive person I decided to multi task and I tried to finish the episode whilst talking to Curtis on the phone for the first time. (Aside – I wouldn’t advise this at all because not only will you sound as though you are not completely interested in the conversation, it’s also quite rude.) Even though I was being responsive on the phone, I could feel that I didn’t sound completely interested and I told Curtis what I was watching, how many minutes left of the show to go and apologised for watching it whilst on the phone with him. Conveniently he said it’s fine, he had something to do anyway and will call back.

I didn’t hear back from him that day. I pinged him the next day and asked what happened as he didn’t call back. He apologised and everything was all gravy. I believe that same day or maybe the next day he asked me if I was busy, I said no and he asked if it was ok to call and I said yes. He did and we had a very nice conversation and we conversed for over an hour. After that we went back to communicating via bbm the days that followed.

Less than a week after we were first introduced, on a Monday I asked him if he’d like to go for some drinks or a nice meal later in the week. He said yes but will let me know when he’ll be available. 2 days later and he still hadn’t mentioned anything about his availability. On the Thursday of that week, during my lunch break, I sent him a ping asking him if he was free on that day or Friday evening. He replied saying I’m free now. I was quite puzzled because I didn’t understand how he could expect me to meet with him around midday on a weekday when he knows I work during the week and I’m at work at that time. Anyway I replied back saying I’m at work and he said he was busy in the evening, so I asked him about the following evening and his reply was: ‘Not 100% sure. ( I must sound like a dick...)’. I told him he didn’t but he sounded busy.

At this point I could have easily thought this guy is not interested in seeing me but because of my dating marathon I don’t think those types of thoughts. I probably would have if I wasn’t doing this marathon. I find that I don’t get offended easily by guys turning me down. Hours later he pinged me and asked if I was free at 20:30 that day and if I could meet him at Waterloo. I didn’t have any plans that evening so I quickly responded and it was a planned date.

The Date
I arrived at Waterloo around the time that we had agreed to meet and waited in McDonalds for Curtis to find me. About 5 minutes later he called me and before I knew it I saw him walking towards me. He looked just like his facebook pictures so I wasn’t disappointed by what I saw. Even though my friend had described him as nerdy, I didn’t see that. I thought his glasses made him look intelligent and I think he is facially attractive but is on the thin side.

Before I got to Waterloo, Curtis had told me that we’ll be in a bar with two guys that he was having a meeting with for about 20 minutes so I had expected to be in the midst of 2 other guys at the beginning of the date. When Curtis got closer to me we said hi and he apologised for the fact that we were going to have 2 people with us. Out of nowhere somebody else appeared and started apologising to me for taking Curtis’s time and said we were going to go over to London Bridge and meet 2 of Labrinth's sisters who are up and coming artists because they are interested in meeting Curtis as they could possibly work with him in the future.

We went to a bar/restaurant in London Bridge. Labrinth’s sisters and a Graphic Designer joined us there. The guy that Curtis came with to Waterloo introduced everyone and we all spoke and one of the sisters and the Graphic Designer had a meeting.  After about 30 minutes Curtis and I went upstairs to the restaurant. We ordered food and got to know each other. The conversation went well and before we knew it the restaurant staff turned off the music that was playing, they made the lights brighter, they started packing away around us and putting up chairs. The two other people that were still in the restaurant got up to leave, leaving just us. We took the cue from there and got ready and left there to look for somewhere else to go. As it was Thursday, the only place that was still open around 23:30 was ALL BAR ONE. After about 15 minutes of being in there they also stopped playing music and made the lights brighter, luckily for us this time there were still a lot of people left in the bar, so we were able to stay in there for another 20-30 minutes before they started telling people to leave.

As it was just past midnight I was getting tired and I don’t think there was anywhere else to go, so Curtis walked me to the bus stop and waited for my bus. When the bus came we hugged and  parted.

I didn’t have butterflies in my stomach but I thought the date went well and I wouldn’t mind seeing Curtis again.

Readers I want your opinions. Even though I said I would avoid going on second dates with the guys that I’ve already been on a date with in my intro blog, do you think I should go a second date with Curtis?

Please say ‘you should’ if you would like to read about a second date with him, even though it may not be date 7 and say ‘you shouldn’t’ if you don’t care to read about Curtis a second time. If I get 5 ‘you should’ and if it is more than ‘you shouldn’t’ I will go on a second date with Curtis and blog about it.

You don’t need to be registered on blogger or have a Google account to vote. I have made the comments open so all you need to do is click comment below, add comment, type in: ‘you should’ or ‘you shouldn’t’ and click publish. You don’t even have to leave your name.

That’s all for this week, please feel free to leave additional comments below or questions if there’s anything that you’d like to know that I didn’t mention.

Thanks for reading My dating year!

Date 5 - Mo

Welcome to date 5 of 26

Guy Profile
Name: Mo
Age: 24
Height: 5:10
Occupation: Engineering student/ Tour guide
Location of date: Marrakesh, Morocco
Date: 04/03/2012

How I met Mo

I met Mo on a road not far from the hotel that my friends and I were staying in Marrakesh. On one sunny afternoon my friends and I decided to get some bottled water from the store that we were told was just behind our hotel; instead of the journey to take about 15 minutes max we found ourselves walking back to our hotel almost an hour later with no bottled water because we were given conflicting directions by the locals, who I believe did not understand what we were looking for. As we were walking back to our hotel, I saw a young Moroccan guy, who looked friendly and approachable, so I decided to try once more to get the correct direction to the store. Unluckily for me he spoke very little English and could not make a sentence in English. As my French was just as bad I called my friend over because her French was a little better than mine and with sign language we were able to explain what we were looking for to the guy, whose name is Mo, and he kindly took us to the store.

After we finished buying the bottled water and a few other things, we thanked Mo and as we were about to turn to make the journey back to our hotel, Mo turned to me and showed me a leaflet that had an excursion on it and asked me if I wanted to go to it with him. I looked at the leaflet and told him that I couldn’t go anywhere without my friends and therefore couldn’t go with him. As I was about to turn to catch up with my friends who had walked ahead to let Mo speak to me alone, he stopped me and told me that I could bring my friends along with me. In delight I called my friends and told them what Mo had said and they too excitedly accepted the offer and we agreed to meet Mo in front of our hotel at 8pm that evening.

The Date

At 8pm sharp, Mo arrived with the bus driver and an English couple who were going on the excursion with us. On our way there Mo and I didn’t speak much because I sat at the back of the bus with my friends. When we got to our destination Mo pretty much left me with my friends to allow us to enjoy what was on offer and I got really involved with the Moroccan people who were playing drums and singing and dancing on our arrival. After we had eaten and danced with the Moroccans, everyone who was on the excursion sat down around a big showground. I sat in between my friends and Mo. The show was really good and we all laughed, clapped and displayed all of the variation of emotions often seen at outdoor shows.

At the end of the show Mo and I walked together towards our tour bus and left my friends behind to take pictures. Whilst we were walking Mo and I tried to get to know each other by asking each other questions. After a couple of questions we struggled to communicate any further because he didn’t understand me, I didn’t understand him and we were both unable to convey what we were trying to say to one another. After a few unsuccessful attempts to continue communicating we gave up quizzing each other and just walked. Mo decided to put his hand around me because I think I must have looked like I was cold. As we walked I felt his hand move lower behind me. For a few seconds I was wondering what he was doing but thought he was just looking for a comfortable position to put his hand, so I didn’t say anything and kept on walking. As we continued to walk the hand just kept on going lower and lower. As it was just about to land on my bum I turned round and said: ‘I’m going to find my friends’. I didn’t care if he understood what I said or not. He made me feel really uncomfortable by doing that and I didn’t want to be next to him anymore.

I made sure I didn’t show that I was upset by what he did because I didn’t want to cause a scene and I would have just ended up frustrating myself if I had approached him to tell him of my disappointment because he may not have understood me. On the way home I sat with my friends again and didn’t say a word to him. When we got to our hotel he gave me a sheet containing his number, email address and facebook name and asked me to add him on facebook. I took the sheet and thanked him for the day and went up to our hotel room.

 

After the disappointing move that he made, I can whole heartedly say I have no intention of contacting Mo or being friends with him on facebook. I think what he did was totally unacceptable and he ruined the good thoughts that I initially had of him. Even though we both knew that nothing was going to come of our date, he could have at least remained a gentleman and then maybe we could have become facebook friends.  

I guess I can’t expect all of the guys that I go on a date with to be decent human beings. I’m back in London now and I hope date 6 will be more respectable and promising.

As always readers’ thanks for reading date 5, if I’ve missed out anything please leave me a comment below.

Thanks for reading My dating year - date 5.